I am changed. I am not the same person I used to be.
Love will do that to you.
You know that scene in the movie 'Elf' where he shows up at his dad's workplace, after falling head over heels for Zooey Deschanel. He spins around in pure delight, gushing "I'm in love, I'm in love, and I don't care who knows it!"
Well that's right about where I'm at.
I've totally fallen for, and I'm completely taken with...humanity. I absolutely love people. It's the most amazing thing ever!
And I can tell you exactly when it started.
It started when I became humble enough to truly love.
Being brought up in a christian home I was taught about love and grace. I invited Jesus into my heart, attended services every week, and memorized scripture. In my late twenties I served in church alongside my husband and this is where God gave me a super-mega reality check.
He showed me that I was religious, and not in a good way. It was in the most stinky, foul way ever. What is being religious? It is believing that you are connected to God because you are following a certain criteria. When many times it's that very criteria or doctrine itself that prevents us from a deeper connection.
I truly loved the Lord and I thought I loved people but I wasn't able to truly love - not yet.
Why?
Because of pride. Religion and pride oftentimes go hand in hand. I wanted people to believe like me and think like me. I wanted them to adopt my doctrine and know my God. And I told myself I wanted this for them because I loved them and Jesus was like "that's not love, that's arrogance". See, I was so intent on the purpose that I had lost sight of the people. And that was my problem- I didn't really see people. So God said "You've invited me into your heart, now I invite you into mine".
I welcomed his invitation, and surrendered to the most incredible journey of my life. The more I discovered the heart of God, the more this "do-right to be-right" girl was proven wrong. A deep well of love started to fill me and I finally began to understand Grace. He showed me that he is absolutely wrecked with love for humanity. The eyes of my own heart were opened, and somewhere along the way I lost the judgments and criticism. A new joy and a much MUCH greater peace took over. I couldn't help but say " I just LOVE people". I don't love them so I can get them saved, I love them outside of an agenda. When I look at a person I actually see them because now I value them.
I have become a student of Love and Life and this is one of the things I've learned so far - it is impossible to Love the way God loves without respecting a person's humanity.
And this is what I know about God- the invitation into His heart is always open.
Thank you for taking the time to read my thoughts! I welcome you to join me in my journey of Love and Freedom.
